It's like every good thing that comes to me ends up losing to the stress and bad things being thrown at me. I feel like the weight of the world is on me and it doesn't feel good at all. Why does this have to happen to me? I'm sitting here at school having a mental breakdown and as I look out the window I see floods of people laughing and living their life not worrying about a thing. And then on the other side, there's me, sitting here by myself feeling not so good about life at the moment. I tend to have an optimistic approach on life but right now I feel like I don't want this life. Why couldn't I be some other kid who doesn't have to worry about getting bills paid. Why can't I have two healthy parents who knows their limit and not push themselves till sickness approach them for them to know life isn't worth all that money. And even when they're sick, they go to work. Really? You're about to get to the point where you can't walk if you don't get treatment. I'm only a teenager. But my problems don't consist of boys and clothing, I'm sitting here calling up thousands of numbers in desperate need of finding a doctor for my mom. Why is this world so complicated? Why do I have to wait one-two months in order to get a doctor to see my mom? And why is it that rich people can just give someone they know a call and get in right away, because they have connections and insurance. I'm sick and tired of how things are running. Aren't doctors supposed to help people? Ok, so someone is about to sit here and watch their bone pulge into their spinal cord while waiting for dimwit to treat them? Ok, might as well just leave them to get worse. And what is so good about money? So good that you give up your health for it? In the end when you die, where do you think that moneys going? Down the fuckin drain. I'm telling you it's not worth it. I know my parents need to work in order to raise me and provide for me, but they need to know their limit. You can't spend 3/4 of your time at work and then the other 1/4 of the time at church. Where does your family fit in? Maybe because there is no time for my family to bond is why my parents consistently argue. Can I have a moment in my house where both of my parents are getting along, please? I used to be shaken up and scared to death when they argue because my mom always threatens with divorce, but honestly right now with the way things are going, it isn't healthy for such a relationship to continue. They get stressed and yell at each other and they take that anger out on me and my siblings. I'm so sick and tired of it. They both are causing harm and stress to one another. The things they say to each other makes me pissed. Just get over it. Remember why you guys loved each other in the first place. Why do I have to act as the grownup in this family? I teach my sibs, I handle their schoolwork, I look at bills, I keep the house clean as running, I call everything and run every errand because that is what you have to do when your parents don't speak English. On top of that this is my junior year, I'm taking the test of my life in one week. I haven't studied, where am I able to find the time? Other kids are taking prep classes and such because they have the opportunity. Well I don't have that type of money so I better suck it up and study myself, just like how I taught myself everything throughout the years, just do it yourself nhi. But you know what? I have a breaking point too.. And this right here is my breaking point.